The death of Roland, the headless ball turret gunner
I have returned from NYC, where Tammy & I had a grand good time, having partaken of such activities as going to the site of the largest out-of-commission carillon in the world (not that they tell you it's out of commission before you go there), fulfilling my life's ambition by eating at Babbo, and seeing a concert at the Stone (with Zorn, Misha Mengelberg, Erik Friedlander, and three other people I didn't recognize in name or appearance [I now have reason to believe that Okkyung Lee was there]). When Matt Weiner wrote about going to the Stone, he omitted to mention the most interesting thing about it, namely that it's the most cursory gesture towards venuehood this side of the Ice Factory. Perhaps that's because he is much more of an avant-gardiste than am I, and is used to seeing concerts in dank armpits, but I would have thought the fact that, rather than a sign saying "The Stone" or something like that, there are only faded signs for what was once probably a chinese restaurant, so that the only way you can tell where you are (if, like me, you only know the intersection, and not the actual number) is by inferring that it couldn't be on any of the other three corners, or that all those people (for some small value of "all those people") wouldn't be lining up outside an empty storefront for nothing.
Also, I expelled some chorizo from my right nostril at a Portugueuse restaurant (that is: that was my location; I didn't expel chorizo in the direction of the restaurant, as if to signal my anger at it or serve as an affront. Do you expel chorizo at us, sir? Is the law of our side, if I say ay?) I don't recommend doing that unless you absolutely have to.
Comments
on 2005-05-17 9:20:51.0, Standpipe Bridgeplate commented:
How did the chorizo get up your nose?
and, further, on 2005-05-17 9:25:04.0, Matt Weiner commented:
so that the only way you can tell where you are (if, like me, you only know the intersection, and not the actual number) is by inferring that it couldn't be on any of the other three corners, or that all those people (for some small value of "all those people") wouldn't be lining up outside an empty storefront for nothing
This is not true! You can also call someone with web-access to see if she has a more precise address, and then ask the people in the grocery store if they've heard of The Stone, whereupon one will look blank and the other will say "I think I heard some people talking about it over there." Process of elimination was next (I was early, so there weren't many people lined up outside).
Also, it does say "The Stone" on the door, in teeny tiny letters.
And I am used to seeing concerts in dank armpits. You want me to tell you about the Millvale Industrial Theater someday?
and, further, on 2005-05-17 9:36:04.0, ben wolfson commented:
The door was open when we got there, by some miracle of timing. Dawdling in the park for just the right amount of time.
The chorizo got up my nose because the swallowing process didn't go right, so it was stuck in the back of my throat, whence it would not dislodge itself, and the process of attempting to dislodge it, and breathing, caused it to ride up. As it were.
and, further, on 2005-05-17 9:44:08.0, Joe Drymala commented:
I seem to remember other, more vaguely labeled restaurants/bars/venues existing here.
Chumley's is totally unlabeled. Dylan Thomas, O'Neill, Arthur Miller, William Burroughs and the like used to hang out there. You can't even see inside from the street. But still, it's sort of well-known, and not really an armpit. The Prohibition-era trapdoors and secret entrances/exits are pretty neat, though.
There's no John Zorn on the juke, either.
I have never been to The Stone.
and, further, on 2005-05-17 9:48:19.0, ben wolfson commented:
I believe that Milk & Honey is unlabeled. I know that it has a s3kr1t phone number (and no public number), and I think you have to Apply for Membership to get in.
One of the non-achieved plans for the trip was the going-to of a totally awesome bar.
Joe, I somehow got the impression that you lived in LA, but you say "here" in your comment. Can you address this?
and, further, on 2005-05-17 10:02:23.0, Joe Drymala commented:
I live in NYC, my friend. Perhaps because I'm recently working on scripts for TV? Not that they've borne fruit, mind.
Yeah, Milk & Honey = Enough, Already. And it's, like so 1998.
and, further, on 2005-05-17 10:03:00.0, Joe Drymala commented:
There should be a comma after "like".
and, further, on 2005-05-17 10:05:36.0, Joe Drymala commented:
The title of this post has me singing "The Lonesome Death of Hattie Carroll".
and, further, on 2005-05-17 10:54:16.0, ben wolfson commented:
You could have beaten me up this weekend, then.
The title of this post has me singing "The Lonesome Death of Hattie Carroll".
Then it has achieved its purpose.
and, further, on 2005-05-17 11:01:01.0, Joe Drymala commented:
Maybe next time you're around, we'll arrange a thumbwar, or something similar that won't involve a demonstration of how much I fight like a girl.
and, further, on 2005-05-17 11:43:45.0, Matt Weiner commented:
Y'know Ben, it occurs to me that the sentence I excerpted is missing at least one verb. Unless you think you can think facts.
The Stone has only been around for about a month and a half, I think, and is the rest of the month for renovations--which perhaps will address some of these concerns.
How was the show, anyway?
and, further, on 2005-05-17 11:44:23.0, Matt Weiner commented:
FUCK FUCK FUCK. 'Closed the rest of the month for renovations.' That petard under my ass feels great.
and, further, on 2005-05-17 11:53:50.0, ben wolfson commented:
You're right, that sentence no verb. I meant something like "... would be worthy of mention".
The show was mostly good. Varied configurations. A woman sang two songs while Mengelberg played, there were improvisations in different groupings.
and, further, on 2005-05-17 0:42:56.0, Matt Weiner commented:
A woman sang two songs while Mengelberg played
And they didn't kick her out? I'd've expected Zorn to be a hardass about noisy audiences.
and, further, on 2005-05-17 13:29:13.0, dave zacuto commented:
"omitted to mention"?
and, further, on 2005-05-17 13:51:28.0, ben wolfson commented:
You have a problem with my choice of phrase?
I admit that it seems odd now that you point it out.
and, further, on 2005-05-17 13:59:06.0, Matt Weiner commented:
Only in the over-finicky way we allus like to talk round here.
If I'd known one of my five readers was planning to visit the Stone, I might have tossed in a note about how to find it. Glad you made it.
and, further, on 2005-05-17 14:01:33.0, Matt Weiner commented:
"Neglected to mention" beats it, though.
and, further, on 2005-05-17 14:49:56.0, washerdreyer commented:
This weekend, someone was telling me about a sibling-bar to Milk and Honey with less restrictive policies (no reservation required, for instance), but I can't remember anything else about it, including its name.
and, further, on 2005-05-17 14:51:20.0, dave zacuto commented:
It is not something that people mostly say.
and, further, on 2005-05-17 16:37:19.0, bitchphd commented:
I was so going to say, "omitted to mention"? And then I realized that there were lots of comments. But as I scrolled down, I could see that no one had said anything yet, and I got all excited at being able to hassle not only Ben, but all the rest of you, and then...
Damn you, Dave Zacuto.
and, further, on 2005-05-17 16:56:45.0, dave zacuto commented:
I can't handle that.
and, further, on 2005-05-17 16:58:55.0, ben wolfson commented:
It's true, dave, that it's not something most people would say. But it is something most people would think, and I consider it my duty as a writer and artist to give voice to the voiceless! How oft was "omitted to mention" thought, yet ne'er so well expressed?
and, further, on 2005-05-17 17:36:03.0, dave zacuto commented:
I don't suspect "omitted to mention" can accurately be described as well- or ill-expressed if it's being repeated verbatim as gleaned from the collective soul of the vocally dispossessed
The point is, you're putting yourself in a questionable position if the transmissions of the Gestalt are being received on your frequency or in your mailbox
and, further, on 2005-05-17 19:01:24.0, bitchphd commented:
I'll lay odds that no one in the history of the world has ever thought the phrase, "omitted to mention."
and, further, on 2005-05-17 19:12:09.0, ben wolfson commented:
and, further, on 2005-05-17 19:18:19.0, Joe Drymala commented:
What about "deleted to mention"? That seems just as defensible.
I omitted to mention that I'm a little bit drunk right now.
and, further, on 2005-05-17 19:20:05.0, ben wolfson commented:
A deletion isn't an omission, though.
and, further, on 2005-05-17 19:27:54.0, Joe Drymala commented:
Fair enough. I guess there aren't really any sins of deletion.
and, further, on 2005-05-17 20:04:25.0, tammy commented:
I'm going to go out and say that omit can modify a verb phrase and that therefore "omitted to mention" is perfectly good syntax. Merriam-Webster agrees, at least as concerns a verbal noun. That is not conclusive, but there is also more empirical evidence, especially in legalese.
and, further, on 2005-05-17 20:12:44.0, ben wolfson commented:
Vindication! And from a linguistics major with more than passing familiarity with the CMS, no less!
and, further, on 2005-05-17 20:22:35.0, ben wolfson commented:
Does the OED lie? I submit to you that it does not.
and, further, on 2005-05-17 20:25:35.0, Joe Drymala commented:
Ben, have you read David Foster Wallace's Infinite Jest? Because you remind me a lot of the lead character.
and, further, on 2005-05-17 20:28:23.0, Craig commented:
Here in the legal world, we use omitted that way all the time. For instance, even as I type these words, I am working on a brief that concerns such an omission. The Army Corps of Engineers has omitted to follow their own procedures and so is on the verge of destroying the last Mississippi-riverine wetland in Missouri.
and, further, on 2005-05-17 20:31:03.0, ben wolfson commented:
Craig, you magnificent bastard! I understand you've found love, good on you. But:
Here in the legal world
Aren't you getting a little ahead of yourself?
Joe: I have never read that book. I think I own it, but if I do, it's in California.
and, further, on 2005-05-18 1:27:40.0, dave zacuto commented:
I really thought omit was strictly a transitive verb; why would you say "omitted to mention," for example, when you could just say that x was omitted from whatever?
and, further, on 2005-05-18 5:28:52.0, Craig commented:
Ben, does not the legal world encompass the process by which we train our lawyers? Regardless, I would think my current role as one of three people trying to stop the Corps from its nefarious doings using the law would qualify me for "legal world" membership.
And yes, I have found love. She is also a member of the legal world, mostly.
and, further, on 2005-05-18 5:32:26.0, Standpipe Bridgeplate commented:
Omit is indeed transitive, but "to mention" is the infinitive, which makes "to mention X" a noun phrase and therefore a perfectly good direct object.
and, further, on 2005-05-18 7:03:31.0, ben wolfson commented:
Which member is she? Arm, leg, shoulder blade? You say "mostly"—is she an amputee, or missing a finger, or some such?
and, further, on 2005-05-18 7:45:54.0, Craig commented:
It is some regions of her psyche that are absent, Ben. Greatly to her credit, my love opts not to devote herself entirely to the practice and study of law, preferring to reserve some time for important things, like, for instance, backpacking.
and, further, on 2005-05-18 14:38:40.0, dave zacuto commented:
Standpipe, you say that "to mention x" is a noun phrase, whereas Tammy's Bennic exegesis has omit be an acceptable modifier for a verb phrase, presumably the same one. How can this be resolved?
and, further, on 2005-05-18 14:44:04.0, ben wolfson commented:
The only solution is ... agar agar!
and, further, on 2005-05-18 15:49:53.0, Matt Weiner commented:
Tammy said "verbal noun"--does that apply to 'mentioning'?
In any case, it is to be resolved by one of the following: (1) pistols at dawn (2) mud wrestling (3) A calypso war; I will conduct the coin flip to see who gets to be Lord Invader and who gets to be Macbeth the Great. And, um, who gets to be the Duke of Iron. It's a very interesting coin.
and, further, on 2005-05-18 16:27:51.0, Standpipe Bridgeplate commented:
Well, let's see. Noun phrases can be subjects, direct objects, or consituents (along with a preposition) of a prepositional phrase, among other things. Let's see whether "to mention X" fits the mold:
Subject To mention X would ruin his future in the armed forces.
Direct object He trusted those to whom he chose to mention X.
Consituent of a prepositional phrase In saunas now he keeps mum except to mention X.
Looks like a noun phrase to me.
and, further, on 2005-05-18 16:28:29.0, Standpipe Bridgeplate commented:
"constituent"
and, further, on 2005-05-18 16:29:30.0, dave zacuto commented:
I think the winner (whichever contest is chosen, though calypso war is the clear favorite) should also get Matt's three-sided coin.
and, further, on 2005-05-19 7:57:23.0, tammy commented:
Actually, Standpipe is definitely right re: infinitives.
and, further, on 2005-05-19 16:20:00.0, Standpipe Bridgeplate commented:
Also, keep garlic out of your mucous membranes
Also, I expelled some chorizo from my right nostril
I see the lesson wasn't learned.