Perverted modem

Oh christ it's good to be back online.  I note a curiosity pertaining to my modem (or, more likely, my computer's setup): when hooked up solely by USB, it thinks it's connected to the computer, but no data flows.  When hooked up solely by ethernet cable, it doesn't think it's connected, and (as far as I can tell) no data flows.  When attached by both cables simultaneously, though, the data surges strong.

Also, I have learned last night that, despite being a 32% genius, I am the dumb, when it took me an inordinately long time to get what's after the little click-to-follow thingy right: